You know who I hate, who deserves everything coming to them, as in horrible and gruesome deaths possibly by the hordes of shape-shifting aliens attacking their planet: The people of the Marvel Universe.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about the superheroes, although there are certainly some jerky ones out there, but I’ll get to them later. No I’m talking about the every day people, the crowd that gathers around the many, many disasters and fights that happen in that world. So why, you may be asking, am I so hateful to a fictional group of people who as a whole don’t have enough personality to fill a small paper cup, well the answer can be found very easily, by flicking through the pages of Civil War.
Ah ‘Civil War’ one of Marvel’s big crossover events, a mini series with numerous tie-in comics and lasting effects for the Marvel world as a whole. Well, I say lasting… A collection of comic books so hated by many a fan that they’ve been know to wish it never existed. But oh it did, it did, and let me tell you it’s infamy for bad writing, some quite frankly shoddy artwork, at least where faces were concerned, a ridiculous premise and the inability to convey any likability in the person we were supposed to be routing for, are all well earned.
Okay so there’s a lot of stupid-ness to go over, so we might as well start with the beginning. So how does this travesty of comic proportions begin?Well, like most bad things in the world, with reality TV. Right, so the short of it is, these assholes playing at superhero are shooting this reality TV show about, well I assume being a superhero. To get ratings up they decided to do a raid on this house where a bunch of super villains are holed up. Just as it looks like they might come out on top one of the villains blows up a school, thus provoking the government to create the superhero registration act. I repeat: one of the Villains blows up a school. Why, you ask, am I emphasizing villains? Because that’s never really addressed in the comic.
Yeah the public just jump straight on the band wagon of ‘let’s blame the heroes’. Not just those specific heroes, no all heroes. I wouldn’t mind so much, because the heroes involved weren’t blameless, they should have tried harder to get the villain away from the bystanders…but the fact that there even was a villain there in the first place is just glanced over. Tony Stark makes some off hand remark about him hitching a ride out of town, and then that’s it…never brought up again. Or at least not in the main mini series, I heard somewhere that Wolverine goes after him, but it doesn’t make it into the main story-line and the regular population as a whole still refuses to acknowledge his part in it all .
So all and all the reason behind the registration action ends up looking like a great big fat excuse. Which I wouldn’t mind so much, if it was intentional! But no, we’re supposed to see this as a reasonable reaction, supposed to be completely on the side of people who let’s face it basically start up a superhero witch-hunt and we’re not even giving a legitimate reason to agree with them. And you know what really bugs me about this, almost as much as a condoned witch-hunt in the pages of my comic-book? It could have been very easy to fix, all they’d have to do would be to make one tiny change to the beginning: have one of the heroes blow up the school. Not deliberately of course, just a simple misfire and *clicks fingers* 700 lives are extinguished and your story just got a little bit better.